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We can’t fix a food issue with a food solution

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I often think about how we try to fix our “food” issues with another “food” solution.
It doesn’t work. 
What I mean is that if we are not happy with our weight or our food choices, we turn to another diet.  We try to control the food.  We then think about what we can and can’t eat all day long.  We log everything, we focus on what we can and can’t eat…all day long.
Is it working?  It didn’t for me!!  Oh, I tried….
I was a diet pro!  I had every book, every program, every food list…and guess what?
It didn’t work. 
I put 100% of my strength into fixing my food issue on my own – but it still didn’t work.  So…
  • I realized I couldn’t fix my food problem with food.
  • I needed to LOOK UP!
  • I needed to look elsewhere.
  • I needed to look at my emotional connection to what food was doing for me.
  • I needed a DIFFERENT solution.
The result?  Freedom!  Freedom from the guilt and the rules that I couldn’t follow for 10 years.  Instead, I started THINKING differently:
  • I would ask myself things like:
  • What is this food doing for me?
  • How is this food I am about to eat going to make me feel?
  • If I eat one of these (or 10) – will I feel guilt in an hour?
  • WHY am I wanting to stuff my face at this moment?
  • What is really going on that is driving me to want to eat the whole pantry and fridge and anything else I can find?
When I started being honest with those questions AND my answers – I started healing.  I realized my emotions were driving me to overeat or make crazy choices.  Therefore, when I started looking deeply into my emotions and working to fix those – I didn’t want to turn to food.  Because food didn’t work.
I believe that every woman has some sort of “food issue”.  We all think about it, we all work to control it, and we all want a fix.   I am here to tell you – our STRENGTH needs to be directed UP on HIM and on finding what is really behind the food struggle.
We can’t fix our food problem with a food solution. 
 
God can and will help us fix our food problem with focusing up on Him, and answering the tough questions that have gotten us where we are today.  Trust me.   It works.  It’s not a quick fix.  It can be tough to sort through some of the emotions.
However, the FREEDOM it brings is worth it.  

We can be the same in a year, or better – it is our decision!   We need to look for a new solution.   A solution NOT involving food!!

 
Read more about our Listen and Lose system on our website and various YouTube vidoes!!

Contentment in our very own boots….

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Tonight I watched my little girl try to put on my husband’s boots.  A cute and precious moment that quickly turned into a moment of frustration for her!  She would get one on, and then try to figure out how to lift her other foot high enough to get it in the other boot.

Then, she would attempt to lift her foot up and that would cause her to fall.  She started crying in frustration.  Now, before you think I am some bad mom watching this without helping, I wanted to see how this 19 month old would handle this situation.  Next, she decided to get back up and this time she set up the boots, scooted them over to the wall, grabbed onto the wall, and figured out how to get the boots on correctly.  Perseverance.   Now to attempt to walk.

She shuffled a few steps before falling yet again, and then she tried to get up.  Finally, she had had enough.  She got her feet out of the boots, she looked up at her daddy and I (who were watching her), and she RAN into her daddy’s arms!  It was like she felt so much freedom in her own feet.

This all got me thinking about how so many times we try to fit into someone else’s shoes (or boots).  We often step out of our own nice fitting shoes and we attempt to MAKE our feet fit somewhere else.  Somewhere they were never intended to fit.  We try, we push, we shove, we fall, and many times we keep up this pattern over and over again.

Do we ever do this?  Do we often try so hard to be like someone else or have what some has, that we end up in a heap of frustration?  Or maybe we just want to be different than we are.  Why?  Why do we sometimes go there?   Well… I think sometimes it is a lack of contentment that drives us to try to fit into another’s shoes, another’s job, another’s personality, another’s life.  Maybe we think that by trying on another’s “life” or a different life, that we will magically gain more peace with our current situation.

The problem with this thinking is that it is false.   Getting into someone else’s boots almost always leads to tears, frustration, and maybe even a fall or two.

The answer?

We need to get our feet out of the boots of others around us, and run free on our very own feet.

We need to stop trying to not be ourselves, and start appreciating the person we are!

We need to get back to finding out who we are, and being content with that person…all parts of her!

We need to be thankful for the boots we have, that fit us well, and wear those with confidence.

We need to remember that God made each of us unique and special.  From our personalities, to our appearances, to our situations…He is right in the center of it all.  He made us, and He loves us.  When we can start to acknowledge and appreciate that fact, we will stop trying to wear another person’s boots.  Hopefully this means we will not fall quite as often, not get quite as frustrated with how things may be in our lives, and hopefully, we will run this life with a bit more peace and freedom!!

Thankful for my sweet Reagan so vividly showing me this lesson today!!

Our boots fit us for a reason.  May we wear them with contentment and thankfulness today!

Stuck in the mud: A story of self-forgiveness and grace

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Yesterday was a perfect day to play in the mud. It had rained all morning, and the dirt was ready to jump in, get stuck in, and get nice and dirty in!  My kids LOVE to play in the mud.  The good part about the mud (for kids), is that it is fun, sticky, and messy.  The bad part about the mud, it is dirty, you can often get stuck, and it is messy!

As I stood there and watched them, I couldn’t help to think about how many times I have been “stuck in the mud.”

Sometimes I have chosen to get into the mud by my own doing, but other times I have turned around and found myself in the mud and didn’t even realize it until I was already knee deep.   Sometimes it is my own mud, and sometimes it is the mud of the world.

I see the “mud” as the hard times we face.  The struggles we go through.  The relationship issues that may come up in our lives.  The tough things at work.  The financial struggles, the parenting struggles, the marriage struggles, or even just a place of emotional turmoil.  We. Get. Stuck.

Now if you are like my kids in the mud, you often will try to throw the mud.  Sometimes at each other, and sometimes on yourself.  You also may push and wrestle and play until you find yourself covered in the mud.  Sometimes you stay down in the mud because it just seems easier than the slippery climb of getting up.

Wow – isn’t that life?  When we are doing through something, how often do we throw our “mud” on someone else or have their mud thrown on us.  I don’t mean intentionally, but we often find ourselves covered in other people’s problems, or we cover others in our own.  Maybe we put blame on others that have nothing to do with our situation, but we do it so that we won’t be in the mud alone.  Have you ever just sat down in the “mud” and stayed put because that is what you know?  Maybe getting out of the mud seems a bit too daunting or unsure?  We all do it.

We fear that we will mess up, or slip back in.  We fear that we are being judged.  We fear there is no grace.

Here is a key factor about this mud.  The  only way out of the mud is to REACH out.   You can’t just try to wiggle out and expect to get very far.  You have to get one foot or hand completely out of the mud and onto dry land to gain some traction.  You have to decide that you are done playing in the mud, and you are ready to get cleaned up.  Sometimes you need help out.  Sometimes you need someone to push you out.  Sometimes you need someone to pull you out.  BUT – Once one foot is on dry land, you have a better chance of taking another step to get your whole body out of the slippery slope.

Now my kids know the next step of getting out of the mud, and that is the cold, freezing, water from the HOSE!  They are not going in the house covered in mud, they have to first go through the painful “initial cleaning”.  It’s cold and rough, but it does the job.  Once they have their first wash down, now they can go into the warm, cozy, sudsy, clean bath inside!!

Getting out of the mud and getting cleaned up is not always pain-free.  In fact, it can hurt and be uncomfortable.  BUT once we are out of the mud and cleaned up a bit, we find that being stuck in the mud is not as fun as we thought.

Whatever your “mud” is today, I challenge you to reach out and step out.  You may need pushed out of the mud, or pulled out to get to dry ground.  Mud can be fun at first – but we always end up dirty.  The cleaning process is not always fun or easy – but when we choose to go a new direction in our life, ask forgiveness, forgive ourselves, then we can stop getting stuck in the mud, and start living again!

Will I let my kids play in the mud again?  Absolutely.

Will I get stuck in my own mud again – most likely.

However, each time, I hope that I learn a little bit more about how not to get quite as stuck as the last time!  Grace, forgiveness, and reaching out….one day at a time.

–Rachel Curtis, P31 Fitness Founder

The Splinter…

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“A splinter is a fragment of a larger object (especially wood), or a foreign body that penetrates or is purposely injected into a body. The foreign body must be lodged inside tissue to be considered a splinter.  It usually must be removed manually to relieve the pain.”

Yesterday, my 5 year old was swinging on our wooden playground and rubbed his foot on some wood, and got not one, not two, but THREE splinters in his foot!! At first, he was pretty tough about it, but as the day wore on, he was in a lot of pain.  We didn’t see the splinters clearly until they were already causing an infection in his foot.  Touching anywhere near the splinters sent him crying and grabbing his leg.

I pulled out the tweezers and the hydrogen peroxide and went to work.  As soon as he saw those tweezers he panicked and started crying.  The first round of this was really for me just to see what we had here.  I did a little work, but then eased off, bandaged it up, and let him play some more.  Then a few hours later, we went in again.  Each time we did this, I was making a little more progress.  But it hurt him.  So much so that he would just see the tweezers coming, and start crying.

How do you convince a 5 year old that although it hurts now, that this is actually making it better?  That once we get through this – the pain will go away?

Finally, at the last attempt, I iced it first (which was also a tough convince) and then went in.  I knew that this final time I had enough skin pulled away that I could grab each splinter.  I went for the longest one first, so he could see how cool it was that long of things was in his foot!!  When I showed him, he got a big smile.  Jaxon!! This was IN your foot buddy!! You are SO tough!!  Then, I went for the next, a little deeper, but small.  He made it through just fine.  But lastly, was the one I had been digging on the most.  It was deep.  I had his sisters talk to him, and I told him to hold his breath, and then I dug one more time and pulled it out!!

It was the biggest splinter I had ever seen!!!  And here he had gone the whole day like that!!  All because he didn’t want to face the pain of the tweezers.

It got me thinking….how many times do I leave painful things in my life because I don’t want to go through the pain of removing them?  Even though I know it will be better once it is gone, it HURTS!!  Maybe it’s a habit, maybe it’s a relationship, maybe it’s a situation…whatever it is that is bringing us pain, I often will leave buried in the skin because I don’t want to face getting it out.

So today, my 5 year old gave me the confidence I needed to stop doing some of the things in my life that are causing pain.  To stop allowing certain things in my life to cause me pain.  To stop accepting painful situations just because it is how it’s always been.  He taught me that you can get through it and you can smile on the other side.

How?  To look UP.  To be STILL and Know that God is in control.  To remember that sometimes pain gets us to where we need to be.  Lastly – to remember that pain often has a purpose.

Anything that brings humility in our lives, and points us to God…can be good.  Even if it hurts.  

Thank you Jaxon for teaching your mommy a very important lesson tonight!!  I will go start the painful process of removing some splinters from my life today – AND being thankful for the lessons they taught me while they were around.  Removing the pain will always be worth it… we just need to see the purpose!!

–Rachel Curtis

P31 Fitness Founder

Answering the question – “Am I enough?”

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I have this crazy belief….but I think there is a lot of truth to it.

Here it is:  I believe that every woman asks the question: “Am I enough?”.

Am I pretty enough?

Am I skinny enough?

Am I smart enough?

Am I good enough?

Am I capable enough?

Am I doing enough?

Am I strong enough?

Am I popular enough?….. on and on

We have all asked these at some point, and sadly, the answers aren’t always a yes!

We find ourselves constantly striving to be more.  Striving to be different.  Striving to be something that we may never be able to attain.

So why do we continue to strive to be ______ enough?

What I found personally, is that when I actually dove into my own personal struggles and my own “enough” questions, it caused some enormous breakthroughs in my life, my health, and my struggles!!  I started to see why I acted the way I do.  I started to see why I had the feelings I do.  I started to see what made me “tick” the way I do.

Wow.

A question I found that I was asking myself often was, “am I doing enough?”.  So, that explained why I spent my time striving and trying to do and do and be better and better.

I don’t know what your “enough” question may be, but I do know that we have to grasp onto this simple truth…that we are ONLY enough when we realize HE is what makes us enough!  God is our strength, our courage, our hope…He makes us enough!!

So, let’s depend on God to fill our  “enough” question,  and rest in that peaceful fact…because in HIM, we are more than enough!!!

In P31 Fitness, we help you to understand that question a bit more and see yourself as HE sees you!!

Watch this short video to learn more and join us!! https://youtu.be/x0x6DcmNFDE

 

 

Less is More

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In a world that screams at us…”more more more”, I have this deep desire to be different.   This past year, we’ve really been trying to simplify our life and the life we are creating for our kids.  From the actual location of where we live, to our day to day lives.  It is hard at times.  It is not perfect.  It makes me feel uneasy sometimes.  It is different.  But it is peaceful.  We are definitely a work in progress, but maybe some of these things will bless you and challenge you as they have me during this new year!!

 

Less Noise, more Quiet

Less Stuff, more Purpose

Less Stress, more Peace

Less Notifications, more Focus

Less Phone, more play

Less Judgement on self, more Grace

Less Rush, more Calm

Less Busy, more Still

Less Activities, more Time.

Less concern of what others are thinking, more focus on what matters.

Less Facebook, more face to face

Less Comparing, more Gratitude

Less Worrying, more Praying

Less Insecurity, more Trust

Less Clutter, more Space

Less is more.  Always will be.

What I am finding is that the more “still” I can make my heart, the more peace I have.  The more peace I have, the more I can be kind and gracious to others.  It’s a cycle that starts with me!!  Less is more.

This all may sound crazy and hard ….and it is, but it’s worth it to slow down, and have less. It’s always more!!

Finding peace in all the noise

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I was playing in our playroom tonight with my kids, and it was loud…very loud!

Let me paint the picture..

One child was playing Christmas music from one of those touch button books.  She was playing jingle bells over and over and over.

One child was asking for cereal to snack on.

Another was sliding down the play slide, and saying “mommy wook, mommy wook” (in her sweet little 2 year old voice that struggles with her “l” sounds!

And the baby was playing on her “noise maker walker dealy thing” that puts out all kinds of squeaks and buzzers.

It was loud.  But it was also really peaceful.  What? 

Yes – I love noisy homes.  Laughter, chaos, and lots of needy voices.  You know why?  Because in my mind, this equals family, love, and togetherness.

But something I find interesting about myself, is that I don’t like noise outside of my house.

I don’t like noisy places, concerts, busy malls, traffic, even my cell phone doesn’t make ANY noise!!  (Yes, I have turned off all notifications).

The noises outside of the parameters of my kids are just too much for me sometimes! They make me want to run and hide~

This playroom scene got me thinking about our own lives and the noise we have going on.  Most of us are busy.  Most of us have a lot of things coming at us.  Most of us are probably a bit distracted by it all.  A bit.

So why does some noise in my life bring peace and other noise makes me anxious, stressed, and a bit out of sorts?  I realized it is the purpose behind the noise.  

When my kids are making noise – it is the noise of fun, love, play….okay – sometimes not those things  🙂 BUT –  it is based on a foundation of family.  Based on a foundation of trust.  Based on a foundation of safety.

When the noises of deadlines, expectations, pressures, or any stressors come at me during my day – those noises are not peaceful.  And what is funny, is that many of these pressures are things I have brought upon myself!

It is very important that we minimize things that are causing too much noise (real noise and busy-noise)!  Maybe that is our phone, or our involvement in social media, or just the things that are filling our brains!!

So, I am aware that I need to be very cautious of the noises I allow to come into my life!  I want my “noises” to bring me peace and not anxiety.  I want the noises to be filled with joy and not stress.  I want the noises to be something I can handle.

I am not sure if you like noise or not in your life,  but when we all can take a look at what is driving the noise, we can recognize it’s purpose and then decide if it is bringing us peace or unrest!

Asking ourselves the tough questions:
– Where am I spending my time?
– What am I allowing to come into my brain and consume me?
– What can I eliminate that will make a space for me to spend more time with the Lord?

So, today, this week, let’s all get rid of those noises that may not bring peace, and create some quiet in our lives.

It’s okay to be still.

It’s okay to be quiet.

It’s okay not to be busy.

It is okay to not look at our phones all day long.  It is okay to not be on every social media outlet out there.

It is okay to miss things in life.

It’s okay to not be involved in everything going on around you.

It’s okay to be okay….

 

Be blessed this week with less “noise”!!!

I can’t do this!!

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I can’t do this.  Hmmm…I know I have said this statement before….and I have for sure thought it!!  You? Maybe when things get tough in life, or maybe before we even start a daunting task!

I seem to learn a lot of life lessons from my kids!  The latest lesson came last week when we took our 4 kids to a water park.  The lesson I learned from my 2 year old was all about facing our fears and moving forward with confidence!

When we first arrived to see the water, slides, buckets, and more, the 2 year old watched her older brother and sister go down the slides with absolutely no fear.  She, on the other hand, had a look of absolute terror all over her face!  When I asked her if she wanted to go down the small slide – she clung to me and said “no way mommy…I not do that!”

As it didn’t matter to me one way or another, we went about spraying each other, dumping water, and just having a great time.  But I kept catching her looking over at those slides.  She would inch a little closer, a little closer, and pretty soon, she pointed to the top and said “I want to do it mommy!”.  Okay!! I was excited for her and went to go with her.  BUT…

This was one of those small kid slides that they don’t let an adult hold them on the way down – and you can’t even walk them up the 4 steps to the top of the slide.  So, I decided that the best spot for me would be at the bottom of the slide, showing her I was there for her!

She slowly climbed the stairs and looked at me again and again for some reassurance.  I was yelling with everything inside of me things like – “Go Taylor!” and “You can do it”…. She would hardly even smile – but she saw me.  She heard me.  She got to the top of the 4 stairs, and all she needed to see at the bottom were my hands and arms open and reaching for her.  Without any hesitation, she went down that slide.

She didn’t say it was fun, she hardly even smiled when she made it, but guess what?  She jumped out of that water, climbed back up those stairs, and did it again.

Every trip I would cheer her on, encourage her, and remind her that she could do it!!  Before I knew it, she was laughing, having fun, and that slide became the highlight of the day!

As I sat there and watched her, I thought about us as adults!!  How many times do we have something that we are facing and we have such fear or dread, that we can’t bring ourselves to start the task?  Or maybe we get started on something, and it feels overwhelming and HARD and so we just want to give up and stop?

BUT what happens when we get a little encouragement from someone else?

What happens when we feel supported?

What happens when we look to God for our help and support?

What happens when someone is there to assure us that it will all be okay, and they will be there every step of the way?

Well, the impossible becomes possible.  The daunting becomes doable.  The task becomes a joyful.

The day at the water slide watching Taylor get through her fear, was full of lessons that I have since used:

  • Encouragement goes a long way (for us to receive and give).
  • Supporting others on their journey is always a blessing.
  • May we try to always be excited for other’s success.
  • Our confidence needs to come from God alone!  When we have God-confidence, we can rest in the truth that He is in control!

This sweet moment with my two year old,  has taught me even more to throw away fear, and have the confidence in HIM to press on and enjoy the process. Every step of the way!!

So I encourage us all…with whatever we may be facing, to climb those stairs today, put a smile on our face, realize we have support around us,  and we CAN slide down that slide of life with a smile!!  May we always keep our eyes focused up on Him as we rest more and more in the God-confidence only He can provide!!

Never forget…You are worth it and you can do it!!

—Rachel Curtis

P31 Fitness Founder

 

My brain space!!!

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Do you ever fell like your brain is full?

Please share in this with me and humor me for a minute.

As in your brain is SO full that you can’t think straight or focus? Yes?  Yes? Yes?

I think some of it is just that we are women and thinking too much about everything is just what we do.  But, I also think there is a bit of overload from society too!  Life is coming at us, and coming at us FAST!  Too fast for us to even process things sometimes!

If you can relate at all – keep reading and you may hear something that can help your brain space not feel quite as full today!

Society now days is just LOUD!  

Lots of things coming at us and lots of ways for us to be contacted:

Emails

Texts

Calls

Voxer

Aps

Facebook posts

Facebook groups

Facebook messenger

Work phones

Cell phones

Just to name a few!!

 

Hear me out -none of these things are bad, and have actually made certain parts of our life easier!

But – this my friends, is quite the list!!

Think back even 10-15 years ago – we didn’t have most of these things coming at us!

So…I think it is safe to say – we have a lot of distractions coming our way!

What does this all have to do with us as women?  What does this have to do with us and finding balance?

EVERYTHING!

So, for me, I have to often take a step back and realize that my brain can get on overload if I am not careful.  Just recognizing this small fact helps me tremendously.

I can find myself feeling a bit “off-kilter” and all I have to do is think back to the last 30minutes to an hour and easily find out why.  Maybe it was an email that came in that was a bit of an attack, or maybe it was the stress of a few texts that required something of me, or maybe it was a post I saw that made me feel not good enough in comparison with whomever posted it.

Whatever it is…these were all things that I allowed to mess with my emotions.  I allowed.  An outside source caused internal overload!  Been there?

So, this week, today, this hour, I am going to be okay with slowing down, turning a few of these things “off”, taking off notifications, and quieting some of the “loud” coming my way.

It is OKAY to not be available all of the time.

It is actually good to not have our phones with us all the time.

It is OKAY to be still a bit.

It is OKAY to not be “in” everything.

It is OKAY to be see that your brain may be a bit full and that you need to make some adjustments.

For me – if I don’t make these adjustments, I will find that I am not at my best for the people and things in my life that deserve the best of me.  My husband, my kids, and certain situations that require a less empty and distracted brain!!

So today, let’s empty out our brains, turn some of the loud off, and be okay with focusing on the things that are most important in your life today!!

Be blessed ladies with more brain space!!

Worrying about what others think…

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We have all worried about what other people think of us at some point or another.  Maybe it is something simple like their opinion of our physical appearance, or maybe we worry about what they think about who we are, our personalities, a comment we made, etc etc etc…you name it!!

I know I can work myself into a complete mess by the thoughts that roll around in my brain… Did I say that right?  Did she think this?   Did I hurt or help this person? On and on it can go! Can you related to this self-talk?  It’s true.

We worry.

We wonder.

And it doesn’t make one bit of difference in the outcome!

All it does is make us crazy with worry and un-needed stress.  

When I came across this quote, I fell in love.

“Don’t worry about other people’s opinions of you.  God never told you to impress people, only to Love them”. 

Take a step back a minute and let this soak in!  Wow!

What is my focus?  What am I worried about in my conversations, actions, and my life?  Am I more concerned with what others think or more concerned with loving others?

So, after addressing these tough questions, I did some self check.  What I realized, is  that there is not room in your brain for you to love someone like God asks, AND also room to worry about what they think of you!  It just isn’t possible!

So, I challenge myself, and anyone reading this, to focus not on what others think of us, but instead focus in on loving people.

Loving them the way they need love.

Loving them when it is tough.

Loving them when we are hurt.

Loving them when we don’t want to.

Loving them when we are struggling.

Loving them and not worrying about what they think.

It’s hard, it’s a challenge, but I do know that it has the ability to bring amazing peace in our lives each day.

Let’s worry less, and love more!!