Worrying about what others think…

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We have all worried about what other people think of us at some point or another.  Maybe it is something simple like their opinion of our physical appearance, or maybe we worry about what they think about who we are, our personalities, a comment we made, etc etc etc…you name it!!

I know I can work myself into a complete mess by the thoughts that roll around in my brain… Did I say that right?  Did she think this?   Did I hurt or help this person? On and on it can go! Can you related to this self-talk?  It’s true.

We worry.

We wonder.

And it doesn’t make one bit of difference in the outcome!

All it does is make us crazy with worry and un-needed stress.  

When I came across this quote, I fell in love.

“Don’t worry about other people’s opinions of you.  God never told you to impress people, only to Love them”. 

Take a step back a minute and let this soak in!  Wow!

What is my focus?  What am I worried about in my conversations, actions, and my life?  Am I more concerned with what others think or more concerned with loving others?

So, after addressing these tough questions, I did some self check.  What I realized, is  that there is not room in your brain for you to love someone like God asks, AND also room to worry about what they think of you!  It just isn’t possible!

So, I challenge myself, and anyone reading this, to focus not on what others think of us, but instead focus in on loving people.

Loving them the way they need love.

Loving them when it is tough.

Loving them when we are hurt.

Loving them when we don’t want to.

Loving them when we are struggling.

Loving them and not worrying about what they think.

It’s hard, it’s a challenge, but I do know that it has the ability to bring amazing peace in our lives each day.

Let’s worry less, and love more!!

Brownies, Sippy cups, and Grace

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Yes, I had a brownie for breakfast yesterday.

Yes, I found an old milk sippy-cup  stuck in the toy box that I didn’t DARE open last week!

Yes, I “should” be doing this or that, and I “should” be eating this or that and I “should” acting this or that way – but you know what?

The “shoulds” of life will about wear you out.  

I’m going to challenge us all to stop saying those “should” statements and instead – say this:  “I did the best I could, and IT’S OKAY!”. 

If you are like most women – we continually feel this need to have it all together, have our kids have it all together, always clean out sippy cups after use so they don’t rot, and have the perfectly healthy foods for ourselves and our families.  Plus, most of us struggle to show weakness, and after awhile, this type of living just can’t be maintained!

We all do it.  We all try to measure up to a standard that we can’t reach.  We all try to justify ourselves when we don’t quite get there, and we all forget about the amazing thing called GRACE!!!!  When is the last time you said to yourself… “it’s okay!”?

Let’s talk about that brownie I ate for breakfast the other day…

It is time that we all need to realize something very important in regard to our health and nutrition:  It is not the treats or the extremes, but the everyday habits that make our lives.  This is a powerful statement because we tend to focus on extremes and beat ourselves up over the extra circumstances, when it is really about the day in and day out way that we live.  Are we making good choices most of the time?  Are we doing better today than yesterday?  Are we having GRACE on ourselves?

What if I told you to go eat some a brownie right now?  It may make you happy, relieved, or you may wonder if I have lost my mind.


BUT  – I will tell you something – that brownie CAN BE the key to our freedom.  You know why many people fail at weight loss or at their goals of getting into shape?  It is not for lack of knowledge, will-power, or ability, it is for lack of freedom.

The moment we tell ourselves we can’t have some food…a brownie for instance…guess what we want?  BROWNIES  and lots of them 🙂  You know why?  Because that is bondage to rules that are almost impossible to follow.   Moderation and focus lead to balance and freedom.  The words “it’s okay” are powerful!!!  Legalize all foods and eat things in moderation and this will make a huge difference in our health.


For years, I would hide what I was eating, binge, hide, diet, beat myself up, binge some more, and promise to NEVER eat “X” again.  That was until the next time I felt stressed, bored, lonely, you name it.  It never worked.  It was a vicious cycle.  A cycle that I hated to be in, and that I hate to see others in as well.  It is hard.  When I finally realized it wasn’t about the food – but it was about an emotional/mental issue for me, things started to improve.

So, if you can relate to what I am saying, please know that I have been there.  Stop making it about the food.  Stop coming up with new “food rules.”  Instead, I beg for you to find out what it is that is “eating” you….deep in your soul.  That is the only true way to find the freedom that we all can have in this area of food.  You notice, I said, “freedom” and I didn’t say “perfection”.  That is a big distinction.

I have found when it comes to food, that until we live out GRACE on ourselves, we will never truly be FREE.  I developed our “Listen and Lose” program in P31 Fitness precisely for this reason.  Stop with the impossible rules.  Stop with the beating yourself up mentality.  Stop with the perfectionistic diets.  STOP.  Breathe.  Listen.  Relax.  It’s OKAY!



Now – onto the “super-mom” syndrome someone decided we should all try to follow.  We can’t possibly have it all together as a mom.  We can try, we can do our best, but if our kids aren’t perfectly cleaned, or perfectly dressed, or they throw a big fit in the middle of Walmart…guess what?  It’s OKAY!!  It’s REAL.  It’s LIFE.  And it is not a reflection of the quality of mom that you are!!  Stop saying…”I should do this with my kids, or I should do that..” – Just do the best you can each day and LOVE those kiddos!!!


All of this is tied in really closely to us understanding our worth.  NEWSFLASH – Our Worth is not tied to a number on the scale or a dress size or what we do or don’t do.  Instead, worth is tied to their inner self.  Our hearts.  Our ability to accept ourselves the way we are!  Stop saying “should”.

Instead – say these words…“I will hold myself to a standard of grace and not perfection.”

Some days just are tough.  Some days don’t go as you expect.  Some days you find yourself not acting and doing the things you would like to do.  Some days you eat the brownie.  And you know what?  It is OKAY!!!  It is!!

Yes, that Brownie was really good.

Yes, I find occasional rotten sippy cups.

Yes, I have reacted poorly to people and situations this week.

Could I/should I have done better?  Absolutely – but you know what?

It’s OKAY! It’s OKAY!

The big deal is to move on, start over, ask forgiveness when we hurt others, and accept the grace that allows us to be human, and not to be perfect.

I hope you will stop saying “should” and start saying “It’s okay”.  I promise peace will wash over you as you do!!

Don’t use laundry soap in a dishwasher!

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Yes, this is what I found last night when I started smelling something odd coming from the kitchen. I opened up the steaming hot dishwasher to find suds everywhere and water leaking out on the floor!

My husband walks in and says – what did you put in there?  I (innocently of course) say – nothing different!!  Then it hits me!!  My 2 year old LOVES to put the soap pod in the dishwasher for me!  Well, she had bounced in the kitchen earlier in the afternoon and said “Mommy – me help..me help” and points to the dishwasher.  She opens it, and puts in the pod, and I close it thinking to myself….I’ll just be able to load the dishes after dinner and not have to put in soap!  Great!

So, after dinner, I do just that…load up the dishes, close it up and push start.  Not even thinking twice OR remembering that the pod she put in looked very much like my laundry soap pods.  Maybe it’s the having 4 little kids that made my brain not really function right – or maybe I’m just trying to make an excuse 🙂

Regardless…it happened.  Suds EVERYWHERE!!!  And you can’t add more water, or it will just make more suds!!  So, I decided to let it sit until all the bubbles went down, and then run the rinse cycle only. However, the smell was not your typical clean dishes smell – it smelled like TIDE!!

I had to just laugh because it hit me – I can definitely relate this to my own life!!

How many times have I tried to “clean up” my life – but I have used the wrong cleaning agent?  What I mean is…how many times have we as humans knew that something was missing…and yet we tried to fill that missing hole with the WRONG thing?

We all have this need inside our soul.  A need to be loved, to feel cherished, to feel valued…and yet we often seek to have those needs fulfilled with the wrong things!

Or, when it comes to health and nutrition, we try to “fix” our health issues with lots of external “bandaid” solutions, that don’t really get to the heart of the matter.

Just like me putting laundry soap in the dishwasher, and it not working right – we all try to “diet” and get disappointed when we don’t turn out to be a size 4 supermodel.  We then try to “fix” it – but we find it only makes things worse.  We then end up in an endless cycle of diets and frustration. So, rather than really getting to the bottom of the issue or our health issues or weight problems, we just try yet another quick fix or solution.   What we find, is the “suds” just keep bubbling up everywhere!

So, I challenge us all tonight to RINSE clean of whatever things we have tried with the intent of “fix ourselves” superficially, and let’s stop!!  Stop the endless cycle, and ask ourselves the tough questions:

  • Is my health or weight issue really a deeper emotional need I am trying to fill?
  • Have I been looking to diets to save me?
  • Am I in a mess of suds and bubbles, but I keep trying and trying things that just aren’t working?
  • Am I getting to the heart of the matter?

We all have to get to the point where we realize that we can’t wash our dishes with a Tide laundry pod.  We have to clean out our hearts and souls and really get to the bottom of why we are the way we are.  THEN we have to have the courage to really find the soap that is right.

So, no matter where you are along this journey, ask the tough questions, acknowledge the things that need attention, make the effort to find the correct cleaning agent, and you fill that hole in your soul!

Let us always remember that ultimately, the soap that can really fix us is relying on the ONE that knows exactly what we need.

Once we can do this, we will find that the endless hole we feel will finally get filled and we can walk in freedom!!



The baggage we carry…

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Have you ever felt weighed down in life?  Maybe you aren’t even really sure why, but you often feel you are just carrying around a lot of extra baggage in your life!  Well, I encourage you to read this article, for some encouragement today!

I recently went on a quick trip up to Wisconsin to work with the new P31 Fitness class there.  This was one of those trips where you are trying to keep everything in the carry on bag – so as not to have to pay the check in bag fee.

As I was packing, and stuffing those carry on bags full (yes I said bags, and not bag), I realized that I probably should reconsider my plan based on the weight and size of my bags!  I kept thinking, SURELY the items will fit in the overhead compartments and I won’t hit too many people walking down the airplane aisle as I make my way to my seat!   🙂

So, I show up at the airport, rolling a bag, carrying a large “purse” (that really was just another excuse for a bag to stuff more items in), and then I complete it with carrying my tennis shoes, book, and snacks.  I definitely was feeling like I was breaking the “TWO SMALL CARRY ON” rule.  But – I did not want to pay more money to check those bags on the Delta flight to Wisconsin!!

DFW airport is huge, and so here I am lugging these 2 “small bags” through the airport, through security, to the snack store to somehow get my coffee, and finally to the gate to wait for the flight.  It was awkward to carry all of that, and those bags started to get REALLY heavy!!  It was at the moment that I look over and see a lady walk in and sit down with ONLY her cell phone in hand, that I started getting envious.  Yes, envious over this free lady with no bags.  Imagine that!!!  I caught myself starring at her thinking – HOW DID SHE DO IT?  And more importantly – WHY didn’t I do that and just check these bags?!?

As I watch more and more people arriving at the gate, I start to get nervous.  You see, my ticket is in the back of the plane.  Normally I like that.  I like to sit at the back, and I like to sit by myself and just dream, or read, or rest.  But today – I started feeling this anxiety rise up in my chest.  I can just envision my long walk down the skinny aisle with not one carry on, but two carry ons…plus my little “extra” items.  I envision me having to apologize for whacking people accidentally, and then once getting to my seat – there probably won’t be any space left in my overhead compartment.  Oh dear.  This will not be good.

Then I look over at this free lady with no bags, and again – wish I was her!!

So, it is time to board, and the BEST thing happens to me, and I am saved from all my fears!!!!  As I walk down the gateway, there are men standing there with pink tickets to hand out in exchange for taking your bag down below during the flight!!  Since the flight is full, they are offering to pink tag the bags and check them right there for pick up after we land.  I am SO EXCITED (it doesn’t take much for me) – because now, I don’t have to try to lug my bags down the aisle and risk hurting someone with all my extra stuff as I walk by them!

The man handing out the pink ticket probably thought I was nuts, because I don’t just hand him my bag – I say  -“oh yes, PLEASE take these bags from me!!”.

Well, the good news is that on the way home, I only had one bag.  I was able to leave my other items with the lady in Wisconsin for P31 Fitness.  Needless to say, it was a much better experience.  I carried a real size carry on, and even at that, I found the pink tag men again on the gateway.  NOW, guess what – I get to walk on the plane home carrying ONLY my book and water.  WOW – what a difference!!!

Now, you may wonder what all of this has to do with nutrition, health, and you today?

EVERYTHING!!!  How much “extra” baggage are you carrying around?  Maybe not even physically, but how about emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually?  Baggage is anything that tends to drag us down, or feel healthy, or things that we feel burdened by in our daily lives.  We all have those things!!

  • Do you find yourself feeling guilty for not being this or that?  Baggage.
  • Do you find yourself not meeting other people’s expectations and feeling like a failure?  Baggage.
  • Do you find yourself beating yourself up for past mistakes?  Baggage.
  • Do you find yourself beating yourself up over your food choices, or lack of “good healthy” decisions in your life?  Baggage.
  • Do you find yourself carrying around the emotional burdens of others? Baggage.
  • Do you find yourself comparing yourself to others and never feeling like you measure up?  Baggage.

Yes, Yes, and Yes….we all do and we all have this baggage in our lives.

How GREAT would it feel just to drop off that baggage at with the man with the pink tag?  How good would it feel to be free from the extra weight we carry, and to just be US?  Real, raw, and free?

It would feel amazing!!! But what I have found over the years both with myself and others, is that we tend to hold onto that extra baggage for many reasons.  A few to name here:

  • We hold tight to our baggage because it is comfortable.
  • We hold tight to our baggage because it is what we know.
  • We hold tight to our baggage because we have a fear of what is on the other side.
  • We hold tight to our baggage sometimes because we don’t even know we are carrying it!
  • We may even hold tight because we have fear of the freedom letting go can bring!
  • Even though it is heavy, uncomfortable, burdensome, we hold on.
  • We may have even let it go, but picked it right back up!!

Well..it is time that we check that baggage in and don’t pick it up again!  

It is time that we realize that we don’t have to carry around the heavy burdens any longer.  It is time that we realize that we can give our cares, our burdens, our everything to the one that can carry it and give us FREEDOM!!!  God wants to carry our load.  He wants us to walk in freedom, and he wants us to have peace!!

So, no matter what you are carrying around today.  It is time to let it go.  It is time to acknowledge that the weight of the baggage we carry is TOO MUCH for us to carry alone.

God wants to hand us that “pink tag” and take our baggage away.

He wants to let us lean on Him.

He wants to help us with the burdens we face!!

He wants us to have FREEDOM!!!

You can and you will – only through HIM…But you have to learn to let it go and give it to Him today!

It is too heavy to carry alone!!  Hand it off and get your “pink tag of freedom” in return!

–Rachel Curtis

Founder, P31 Fitness



The Carnival ride

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carnival ride

It is interesting that on a week that we are focusing on PEACE, that the Curtis family decides to go to the small town carnival.  We pull up, I see kiddie rides, I get the kids their arm band, and expect to stand and watch them go round and round.

That is until my sweet 4 year old Jaxon decides that he needs to ride the one big kid ride out there.

Now, Madison (6 years old) is big enough to go without an adult, but Jaxon has to have my husband or I with him.  I look at my husband – give him the nudge, he nudges me back, and then Jaxon says to me – “mommy, please ride with me!”.

Now, a few years ago – I would have said – no big deal – YES, I will go with you.  But as I looked up at this rickety carnival ride, that has been traveling across TX in a TRUCK, and is spinning in little cars while going up and down and all around, I start to have some serious doubts! Here is this little 4 year old with bright eyes, ready to go…and I start to really wish my husband had been the lucky pick.

But, how can you resist a little boy?!?  So, I decide to go for it!!

We get into this metal car that about pinches my legs off and the carnival man says – “now, your only job is to make sure that your son doesn’t fall out”.  Really?!?!? What is that about?

So, we start and I am making the most of it…I am “woohooing” and laughing, and it is great….until he speeds us up.  Now, since I weigh about 3 times what Jaxon ways, our cart was lopsided…sending us spinning and spinning super fast.  We are spinning, the ride is spinning, the carts are going up and down and then we LURCH up and him and I bounce off of our seats.  I really thought we were about to fly out of that secure little metal car.

Oh – did I mention that the ride did NOT even have seat belts?!?  Yikes!

I scream, he laughs, and I felt my heart about bounce out of my chest.  When I realize we are all okay, the fear leaves, and I do my best to enjoy the rest of the ride.

When I got off, and my husband is just grinning.  You know that grin that is like – “I’m glad it was you and not me” type of grin?

So, after I stopped shaking, I realized what a funny coincidence that our focus was on PEACE this past week. I was anything but peaceful.  Not before, not during, and not after!!!

It made me realize how much I let my outside circumstances control the level of peace inside of me! Let’s be real for a minute – doesn’t your life feel like a carnival ride sometimes?!?  Can I get an amen?

I am sure you can relate!!!  Do you ever look at your life, and feel anything EXCEPT peace?  Probably!!

So, as we left the carnival, and I watch my kids with BIG smiles, and fired up about all they got to do, I realized that sometimes peace doesn’t mean everything is always ok in our minds.

What it meant that night to me, was that everything didn’t have to be in control.  That everything could feel chaotic and scary, but that I could follow my 4 year olds’ example and TRUST.  That I could have a little fear, and make it through!!!


So, no matter where you are in life, or what “ride” you may feel you are on – remember that GOD is holding you.  He can ease your fears and your panic.  He can make it okay!!  We just have to trust HIM through the carnival ride!!!  

–Rachel Curtis

Founder, P31 Fitness

Grace Grace Grace

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Have you ever messed up?  Like really messed up?  Or maybe just something that you were embarrassed about, and beat yourself up about for hours or days or months…. Yes….sadly we all have done so.  On the flip side – do we hold ourselves to a standard of grace?

Or ….have you found yourself justifying yourself or your actions when you didn’t even need to do so?

I heard it the other day in regard to food…my friend was handing her kids some snack and looked at me and said – “we normally don’t eat pop tarts, but I am letting them today”.  It was like she thought I was judging her or thinking that I couldn’t believe she was feeding them that.

I QUICKLY eased her fears and told her my kids had pop tarts for breakfast that day 🙂

A powerful verse in the bible – “Romans 12:1 – In view of God’s MERCY, offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to Him.  This is your spiritual act of worship.”  WOW!! Did you catch all of that? God has mercy and grace on us…AND us taking care of our bodies and offering them to Him is actually a spiritual act!! So..self care and grace on yourself DOES matter!!

Now..back to the beating ourselves up…. We all do it.  We all try to measure up to a standard that we can’t reach.  We all try to justify ourselves when we don’t quite get there, and we all forget about the amazing thing called GRACE!!!!  When is the last time you said to yourself… “it’s okay!”?

Let’s talk about food for a minute.

What if I told you to go eat some chocolate right now?  It may make you happy, relieved, or wonder if I have lost my mind.  BUT it is also the key to our freedom.  You know why many people fail at weight loss or at their goals of getting into shape?  It is not for lack of knowledge, will-power, or ability, it is for lack of freedom.

The moment we tell ourselves we can’t have some food…chocolate for instance…guess what we want?  CHOCOLATE and lots of it 🙂  You know why?  Because that is bondage to rules that are almost impossible to follow.   Moderation and focus lead to balance and freedom.  The words “it’s okay” are powerful!!!

It is time that we all need to realize something very important in regards to our health and nutrition:  It is not the treats or the extremes, but the everyday habits that make our lives.  This is a powerful statement because we tend to focus on extremes and beat ourselves up over the extra circumstances, when it is really about the day in and day out way that we live.  Are we making good choices most of the time?  Are we doing better today than yesterday?  Are we having GRACE on ourselves?

Are we experiencing true FREEDOM as God has given to us each day?  Legalizing foods and eating things in moderation will make a huge difference in our health.  One (or two) piece of chocolate will not make us fat!  However, lots of chocolate every day will have very negative impacts on our health!  

So, we need a new approach!!

I have dedicated my life to helping women understand their worth is not tied to a number on the scale or a dress size.  Instead, worth is tied to their inner self.  Our outer self, weight, self-esteem, is all based on how we feel about ourself on the inside.  What we feel about ourselves shows on the outside.  Every time.

So, I ask this question:  Do you love yourself?  Do you feel that you are WORTH IT?  God tells us every day that we are worth it  – and it is our job to believe that with our whole heart.  MOST IMPORTANTLY – do you really understand that God has tremendous GRACE on us each day?

If you don’t feel worth it, may I ask why? What in your past has caused you to feel unworthy?  A person, a circumstance? I know for me it is often my own thoughts.  They come in when I least expect them, and they try to take over my daily life.  Maybe it it doubt, fear, or a self-confidence issue.  Whatever it is, I know that they have the power to make me feel unworthy in a heart beat.  When this happens, my daily goal is to stop those thoughts in their tracks and remind myself of what GOD has said about me.

HE SAYS WE ARE WORTH IT!  And He always speaks truth. 

So, what does all of this have to do with Grace?  EVERYTHING!  In order to be balanced and healthy in life, and experience true freedom, we have to place our foundation on God and the grace He provides.  When He is our center, our balance will fall into place.  He wants for us to experience freedom unlike we have ever known.  But we must come to Him for that freedom and GRACE!


You are enough

–Rachel Curtis

Founder, P31 Fitness

Freedom from the dreaded scale! The fence and candy bars!

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Have you ever felt this way?  If you are a woman….you have!  The scale can be a dreaded thing for sure!  It can even lead to bondage in our lives!!

We recently moved out to the country and our two lab puppies, (thank you Santa) taught me a HUGE lesson in regard to food, weight, the scale and more!  I just had to pass this along.

We previously lived in a neighborhood with a high wooden fence.  Our dogs would get so excited when the gate would get opened…why?  Because they could escape the bondage of the wooden fence and run FREE!  But where the lesson comes in, and what is so funny to me, is that they would sprint out that gate, run around for awhile, we would chase them, call them, and eventually give up.  But guess what, as soon as we stopped playing their game and let them be, they would eventually come back into the fence.  So why did they run out of the fence at the first chance?  Why did they keep running when we were trying to contain them?  It is all about the boundaries and what they couldn’t have!

It got me thinking long and hard about our own lives with food, weight, scales, and our health.  I have a theory that the reason that diets don’t work is because we tend to focus on all of the things that we can’t have.  When we are on a diet, we often obsess, look at the “do not eat” food list, feel deprived, and honestly, feel a bit trapped.

Just like our dogs with the fence, we CRAVE freedom.  When we try to go on a diet, we often feel trapped inside of our own fence.  We are told what we can and can’t have on a diet, and at first it sounds good, but eventually, we want out!!  We want to escape the fence and run free.  That usually comes in the form of “cheating” or giving up.  We get outside of the fence and feel like we can’t control ourselves in the area of food.  We go crazy for a few hours, days, weeks, and then we get on the scale and think…OH NO!!!!

So, we walk ourselves back into the fence to try to “diet” again.

Well, we have moved out to the country, and there is not a fence here at all.  We live on some acreage and our puppies are here with us.  Guess what?  They don’t run away, they don’t run crazy, they stay close to us and are actually much more calm.  Why?  Because there isn’t a fence!!

So, are you staring to see how the fences and diets we put in our lives can often lead to more bondage?  Can you start to see why often diets don’t work?  Can you start to understand why we crave freedom in the area of food?

I want to challenge you today to live outside of the fence and NOT run around crazy.

I want to challenge you today to start to “legalize” foods that you previously had on your “don’t eat” list.

I want to challenge you today to eat a little something that you previously “couldn’t” or “shouldn’t.

I want to challenge you today to start to connect your emotional state with what you eat or what you want to eat.  You will be surprised at how these 2 usually go hand in hand.

I want to challenge you today to eat a candy bar if that is something that sounds good to you.

What? The founder of P31 Fitness is telling you to eat a candy bar?  YES!  Why? Have you ever said you were not going to eat a candy bar….and then what is the only thing you wanted??….The candy bar!!!

In P31 Fitness, we teach a system called Listen and Lose. We teach you to check your emotions. We teach you to be cautious of crazy diets and anything that causes you to get consumed with calorie counting, tracking, or restrictive eating.

Remember, the more restrictions we place on ourselves, the more bondage we often feel, and often the more opportunity we are giving ourselves to break those “rules”.


So, I want to tell you something very important today: 

  • Give yourself some grace today and have a small treat. That small treat will probably “do the trick” for you and allow you to legalize that food.
  • When we start to legalize all foods, we realize that the emotional pull to eat it, will start to go away!
  • We start to be able to escape our fence boundaries, and not feel that we have to be crazy and eat everything in site.
  • We start to live in freedom in this area of food, weight, and the scale! We start to LIVE instead of just survive.
  • We start to feel our worth isn’t determined by a number on a scale, but instead on WHO we are in Christ!!

You are worth it ladies!! You can do this!!!!

–Rachel Curtis

Founder, P31 Fitness